Friday, May 28, 2010

To keep or not to keep?!

Many people must be thinking that God is UNFAIR! Why?

Some couples who longed to have a baby just kept getting disappointment. No matter how hard they tried, how much money they had spent, the results are still negative. Seeing other people's kid, they just wonder what is wrong with them. Doctor said both of them are healthy and fertile, such answer makes them more miserable. Is it due to stress? Stress from work? Stress from both sides' families? Some cases are due to either one of the partner is 'abnormal'. For such claim, it really makes the 'abnormal' one guilty everyday. Is it due to karma?

Some of them finally got pregnant but after several weeks, miscarriage happened. It is very heartbreaking. Especially for the mothers who already felt attached with the fetus inside them.

Some young or unmarried couples who don't want to have kids just get pregnant easily. They feel scared to have such big responsibility in their life as some are still schooling, some are jobless and most of them don't plan to get married at all. Look at how many abandoned children every year. Who is the innocent one?

Some married couples who already have kid/kids were satisfy and contented with their current situation. Due to pleasure, 'accident' does happen from time to time. Mothers are the one who get emotionally affected the most. Some are happy, some are unprepared, some are in great shock and most of them are in big dilemma. Due to hormone changes in their bodies that make things worse?

"My youngest boy already 10 years old, I am almost 40 years old, it is too tough to have another baby in our life." This is one of the common statements from a mother. (Yes. It is not easy to 'restart' again. Not only aging makes pregnancy difficult, by taking care of the baby and looking after the other children are uneasy.)

"We already have 4 children. My husband is unemployed and we already have financial problem. We can not have another baby!" a mother cried in front of me while telling me this. She said when her husband found out that she is pregnant, she can't see or feel any joy from him. Although she understands their financial problem, she just feel devastated to see her husband's reaction. This is not the time to blame whose fault in this, but she just feels so hurt that she has to go through everything 'alone'.

Financial is always the biggest problem in the family. By worrying money, mother will be the one who has sleepless nights. Some started to take up more part time job for extra income, in the end the body couldn't take it. Suddenly, life becomes so miserable for this pregnant mother.

Whenever she sees her husband sitting in the living room, watching television programme or reading newspapers, she just feel like strangle him to death.

To go for abortion or not, this is always the thought in the mothers' mind who really don't want to have another baby. Guilt --it is a life, we are talking about; Responsibility -- it is a lifetime responsibility we have to think about; Reality -- Nobody can help us, only we can help ourselves. That is the fact in this big world!

Having a baby is not good news for everyone. Not every fetus are welcomed or wanted by his/her own parents. I know it is sad to know such truth but this is life.

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